Sunday, March 2, 2014

Test Posting Schedule!

Hello everyone!

I know I've been gone for quite some time! Unfortunately we had several family emergencies come up, new developments with Bug, and things have just simply been hectic! At long last, I'm getting back on board with everything and playing catch up!

In doing this, I'm going to be test running some posting schedules to see what works best!

New posts can be found here on Sunday, Tuesday, and some Fridays!

Read on, followers!

Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Guess what, it's OKAY.

Right now I am laying on my bathroom floor typing this from my cell phone, recomposing myself.
After a particularly brutal outburst of Bug's, an end-all tantrum, the calm down, and an outburst of my own that I'm not too proud of, I found myself here.
I slammed the bedroom door behind me on my way into the room, the bathroom door after that, I didn't bother with the light. I sunk down to the floor, and I bawled my ever loving eyes out. Seriously. I could have probably given Bug's meltdown a run for it's money.
Here's what I want to say to all parents out there, whether you have a child with special needs child, or whether your child is normal (whatever that means). After I "sucked it up" and sat here for a few moments to have a chat with the Big Guy (God, dears) about helping me find the strength; he reassured me that what I just did was OKAY. That's what I want to share with all of you.
It. Is. Okay.
It. Will. Be. Okay.
It's not about the breakdown and the devastation you feel in the heat of your breakdown. It's about finding the strength within to recompose. To take several deep breaths. To wash your face off, run a hand through your hair, and to get back up.
So if you feel like you need it right now, I'm here to tell you go on. Go do what you gotta do. That bathroom rug is awful soft. But remember to get back out there.
It IS going to be okay.

Thursday, August 29, 2013


I sit here, watching him. He's standing next to the rocking chair, hanging over the arm towards the seat, contently rocking himself lightly with one foot, while the other remains firmly planted on the ground. Gnat's out of sight, but I can hear him bouncing a ball just on the other side of the couch. I'm unconcerned. The room's child proof as much as it can be without ever teaching my kids something can hurt them.
Bug's just rocking away, though, watching TV on this lazy morning.

I still feel the shame of yesterday clutching at my chest, but I thank God for letting me realize it immediately. Yesterday we received the findings of the occupational therapy we've been going to for the past six months. Out of four short-term goals (should have been completed within the six months), and four long-term goals (anticipated to be nearly a year to be met), we met one.

Originally, that was a dejected we met one. Just one. And then I thought about years of school. Years of report cards consisting of A's and B's and one C and that one C my mother just wouldn't let go. It was in that moment God opened my eyes, and I saw it. We didn't meet one. We met one!

Thank you, God, we met one of his goals! HE met one of his goals. Bug did it. He can tie shoes four out of five times unassisted! UNASSISTED! Suck it, society! HE MET ONE!!! *Cue internal dance party*

We still have bad days. Hell, we still have awful days. But you know what?

He met a goal.

My son, A the Awesome.

Bug's first name starts with an A, just a quick BTW about this post, lol.

Thursday, August 8, 2013

Look Down! The Great Sock King!

Have I ever mentioned that Bug and Gnat do some pretty weird stuff? If not, this is me, mentioning it. For example.

Bug, whenever he goes down the steps, now stomps in time and sings "Look Down" from Les Miserables. Specifically he sings the one from the very beginning, including all the spoken-sung parts. Yeah. Weird. Cool, but weird.

And Gnat? Gnat is The Great Sock King! Yes, with the exclamation mark. I don't know what it is about this kid, but he is overjoyed to see, hold, play with, etc. socks. If it involves socks, he's in love. Seriously, he usually runs around with two pairs on his feet, a pair on his hands, and an armful of them. While this sounds absolutely adorable, and can be, especially when he gets the one on top of his head as well, it makes for a horrid time doing laundry. Oh, and he's never like that long enough to take a picture. It's like a secret identity for him or something, I swear.

Speaking of, The Great Sock King visited our home again today, and now I have to retrieve the clean socks from all over the house. So yeah, I'm going to go have sooo much fun with that.


Just one small example of the weird stuff my kids do.

Tuesday, August 6, 2013

The Wooden Roses, and Life... Itself!

Okay, so the life itself thing was kind of a lame joke, but if you've ever been to the Rocky Horror Picture Show, you'll get it. Or maybe I just really am that weird... Meh... Whatever!

So Cowboy and I were finally able to have our wedding ceremony, and what a fantastic day it was. There are some things, of course, that led up to that day. One of the first of these things were the wooden roses. It was one of the first gifts he'd ever given me, and it was the first gift he'd ever given me just because...

These suckers are nearly four years old, and they've been cut down to fit in this cute little jar I have, that way they can live on my desk and I can admire them always. With how hectic life tends to be, I've been feeling like Cowboy's getting left in the dust here lately. Ironic, considering he's the one who has to leave for large periods of time at a time for work, but maybe that's a contributing factor? While he was on deployment I wrote him a letter everyday for while he was gone, though I may not have always emailed him, or even had the capability of emailing him. But that letter was written at the end of every night, never fail.

This post, is a gush post. Feel free to stop reading now, as you have been warned!

March 4th, 2011 at approximately seven thirty pm Cowboy proposed to me. In quite an unorthodox manner. He'd been gone for Valentine's Day, and had just returned a few days beforehand. We were already living together at this point, it seemed silly not to. He spent all of his free time at the house already, and if he wasn't at the house, we were out with Bug doing something or the other. He was cramped up in a tiny barracks room on base, that he had to share with someone else, it was the best decision all around.

I'd made reservations at The Melting Pot on March 4th. It was the first Saturday he'd be home in quite a long while, and I figured it'd be a nice surprise. All he knew was to dress up, and be ready to leave by six. We lived a ways from the restaurant. I even went so far as to blindfold him for part of the way there. Yeah, I'm lame, I know.

We arrived at the restaurant, made our way back to a precious alcove in the restaurant, with a two person booth, a gorgeous bouquet of flowers, and a bottle of wine already chilling on the table. Never having been to the restaurant before, I figured that it was just how all the tables were set up. We settled in, Cowboy asks if I would like a glass of wine, and with him in his button up, slacks, and sports jacket, and me in my super classy dress, at this gorgeous, expensive restaurant...

See? Classy!
"Baby, that's crazy. They probably charge an extra thirty dollars if you crack that bottle! We can buy the same one for twelve on the way home!"

Yeah... SUPER classy. Listen, we were trying to buy a house. I wanted it to be a special night, it didn't need to be that special. After much assurance that the bottle and bouquet belonged to us and were ours to have, and the dunce I am not thinking twice about it, I went ahead and had a glass... and then I saw the menu and had two more glasses.

We had a FANTASTIC meal, and our waitress, though hard to understand, was an absolute sweetheart. (She had just recently moved here, and English was not her first language. I wish I could remember her name, because she was fantastic!) We'd chosen a three course meal for two, and it was simply amazing. Finally dessert rolled around, and the lovely waitress comes out, and says, "I believe this is for the lady, extra special, just for her." And sets this down in front of me...

If you look extra close, tucked inside the rose petals is my engagement ring. He insists I cried, I insist I didn't, but what I did do was smother him in the biggest, most obnoxious, public kiss EVER. Apparently it wasn't enough of an answer, so he had to double-check with a, "So... is that a yes?" Cue big, cheesy, newly engaged grins. Eventually leading to our engagement, and engagement pictures (that first one up there), a wedding, and finally a full wedding ceremony to celebrate two years of marriage...

Supposedly this is called a "high fashion" shot. I call it a, "Damn this dress makes my waist and boobs look fantastic, and my husband more than agrees" shot. Lol! We also celebrated Cowboy making first class, which meant a rush to get that spiffy uniform he's in to have the new patch with three stripes added on, but who cares? It was lovely.

The point of this post... Well, even with this fantastic wedding ceremony, there was a lot of stress leading up to and following it. We still don't know what's going on with Bug, and I had taken him to two appointments during that week. Including having to drive out of state to handle a three-year-old speeding ticket. Plus the possibility of having to move in four (now three) months, and just a myriad of things. Unfortunately, Cowboy had to leave mere days after the ceremony, and still has not returned yet.

In the throes of this, and ongoing appointments for Bug, and a teething Gnat who has been miserable, plus trying to get back to this blog, while still managing my author blog, as well as launching an editing company that sparked a bit faster than I anticipated, it's been difficult to remember to leave time for Cowboy. I love him more than ever, and I love that he supports me, and what I do. I could not have asked for a more perfect man, and our time together has been some of the happiest, brightest times of my entire life, and I can't wait to see where the next adventure takes us.

Cowboy, I know I don't always get to tell you, and sometimes I'm a grumpy grump (yes, that's the term we use in this house), and I know work is hard, and that you hate cleaning the litter box as much as I do, yet you do it anyway, and then you spoil the cat rotten after cussing her name out the entire time, and that it's a pain in the butt to find time for us at the end of every night that's not both of us passing out watching Netflix on our respective phones, but I love you. I love you to the moon and back, and twenty-thousand leagues under the sea. Though you've assured me that the sub doesn't go that deep. I love you.

*All photos with a tag are from the wonderful Devon Shanor of Devon Shanor Photographer... As per usual. We love you, Devon!

Thursday, May 23, 2013

Surprise Bachelorette Party... Party of Two?

Sat down to start writing to all of you, to discover that even though one of my good friends is getting married tomorrow, to one of Cowboy's good friends, she's doing NOTHING tonight.
So, I'm leaving you all to go pick her up for a surprise bachelorette party!
And by surprise bachelorette party, I mean her and I going to a local bar to sit on the deck with a margarita tower and listen to a cover band.

Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Early Day Say Whaaat?

Cowboy got home freakishly early from work today, so we decided to take the boys (okay, we took Bug, Gnat slept) to see The Croods.
Dun dun duuuunnnnn.
(You gotta see the movie.)
It was cute, with just enough meaning and importance behind it for it to strike thoughts into kids who were old enough. Or, in Bug's case, smart enough. (What? Me? Brag on Bug's intelligence? Nooo... Yeah. Lol.)
Now, off to harass Cowboy while he plays his video game, since tomorrow I have to focus on work.
PS: Did I mention that Bug still begged us to go back to the bookstore even though we'd just taken him to a movie? 'atta boy!